The Absurd Teachings of Mormonism

Below is an extensive blog post addressing the absurd teachings of Mormonism, including its claims about the Book of Mormon’s origins, the doctrine of Jesus and Satan as brothers, the concept of God living on a planet, historical racism against dark-skinned people, polygamy, the angel Moroni, and how these align with biblical warnings about false gospels and teachers like Joseph Smith. The piece is written in a critical, reflective tone, grounded in historical and theological analysis, and avoids inventing unsupported details.

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The Absurd Teachings of Mormonism: A House of Cards Built on Sand

Mormonism—officially the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS)—presents itself as a restoration of true Christianity, but peel back its layers, and you find a tapestry of bizarre doctrines, historical inconsistencies, and teachings that clash with the Bible. Founded by Joseph Smith in 1830, this American-born religion leans on the Book of Mormon, a text Smith claimed was divinely revealed via golden plates and an angel named Moroni. Yet, from plagiarism scandals to wild cosmology, racial biases, and polygamist roots, Mormonism’s teachings raise red flags. The Bible warns of “another gospel” (Galatians 1:8) and false prophets—could Smith and his angel fit that bill? Let’s dive into the absurdity and unravel why this faith feels more like fiction than divine truth.

The Book of Mormon: Plagiarism or Divine Revelation?

The Book of Mormon is Mormonism’s keystone, touted by Smith as “the most correct of any book on earth” (History of the Church, Vol. 4, p. 461). He said an angel, Moroni, led him in 1827 to golden plates buried near Palmyra, New York, written in “reformed Egyptian”—a language no linguist has ever verified. Using a seer stone in a hat, Smith “translated” these into English, publishing the book in 1830. But the text’s origins are shaky at best.

Critics quickly spotted parallels with existing works. Over 27,000 words—hundreds of verses—lift verbatim from the 1769 King James Bible, errors and all. Second Nephi quotes 18 chapters of Isaiah wholesale, while Third Nephi rips from Matthew 5-7. How could a text buried in 421 AD by Moroni contain 17th-century English Bible passages? Scholars like Fawn Brodie (No Man Knows My History) and B.H. Roberts, an LDS historian, flagged similarities to View of the Hebrews (1823) by Ethan Smith, which posits Native Americans as lost Israelites—a core Book of Mormon theme. Eber Howe’s 1834 Mormonism Unvailed pushed another theory: Smith plagiarized Solomon Spalding’s unpublished novel. Though Spalding’s recovered manuscript didn’t fully match, the overlap in style and ideas fueled doubts.

No archaeological evidence backs the Book of Mormon’s tales of vast Nephite and Lamanite civilizations in the Americas—no cities, no swords, no “reformed Egyptian.” Contrast this with the Bible’s corroborated sites like Jerusalem or Jericho. Smith’s defenders say he wove these sources via divine inspiration, but the simpler answer—occam’s razor—points to a clever remix of his era’s religious fervor, not a heavenly download.

Jesus and Satan: Brothers in a Cosmic Family?

Mormon theology flips biblical Christianity on its head with a jaw-dropping claim: Jesus and Satan are spirit brothers. Per Gospel Principles (LDS manual), God (Elohim) and a heavenly mother birthed billions of spirit children in a pre-existence near a star called Kolob. Jesus, the “firstborn,” offered a salvation plan; Lucifer (Satan) pitched rebellion. God picked Jesus, Satan fell, and we’re all their siblings (Pearl of Great Price, Moses 4:1-4). This polytheistic twist—multiple gods, spirit kids—jars with the Bible’s monotheism: “Is there a God besides me? No, I know not any” (Isaiah 44:8).

In Scripture, Jesus is eternal God incarnate (John 1:1, 14), not a created being. Satan’s a fallen angel, not Christ’s kin (Ezekiel 28:13-17). Mormonism’s cosmic soap opera recasts the Trinity as three separate gods, shredding Deuteronomy 6:4: “The Lord our God, the Lord is one.” This doctrine’s absurdity isn’t just theological—it’s a radical rewrite of who God is.

God on a Planet: Kolob’s Celestial Address

Mormonism’s God isn’t the transcendent Creator of Genesis but an exalted man who earned godhood. Doctrine and Covenants (D&C 130:22) says He has “a body of flesh and bones,” living near Kolob, a star or planet from the Book of Abraham—another Smith text “translated” from dubious Egyptian papyri (later proven unrelated funeral scrolls). Lorenzo Snow’s couplet sums it: “As man is, God once was; as God is, man may become.” Humans, too, can ascend to godhood, ruling their own planets.

This sci-fi theology clashes with the Bible’s unchanging, infinite God (Malachi 3:6; Psalm 90:2). No Kolob appears in astronomy—Smith’s imagination, not revelation, birthed it. The idea of God as a former mortal, procreating spirit kids with a wife (or wives), feels more like Star Trek than Scripture. Where’s the evidence? It’s a leap built on Smith’s word alone.

Racism Baked In: The Curse of Dark Skin

Mormonism’s history reeks of racial bias. The Book of Mormon ties dark skin to a curse: Lamanites, rebellious descendants of Lehi, got “a skin of blackness” as divine punishment (2 Nephi 5:21). “White and delightsome” Nephites were favored—until 1981 editions swapped “white” for “pure,” softening the racism post-1978. The Book of Abraham (1:24-27) links dark-skinned Egyptians to Cain’s curse, barring them from priesthood—a policy Smith and Brigham Young enforced.

From 1849 to 1978, Black men couldn’t hold the LDS priesthood or join temple rites, deemed less valiant in the pre-existence. Young called it God’s will, citing Cain and Ham (Journal of Discourses, Vol. 7, p. 290). Only in 1978, under pressure, did a “revelation” lift the ban. The 2013 LDS essay “Race and the Priesthood” disavows this, blaming cultural “folk beliefs”—but the texts and leaders’ words linger. This isn’t biblical; it’s 19th-century prejudice dressed as doctrine.

Polygamy: Divine Command or Lustful Excess?

Smith introduced polygamy secretly, denying it publicly while marrying at least 34 women, some as young as 14 (D&C 132). He claimed God mandated it for exaltation—celestial marriage to populate planets. Brigham Young, with 55 wives, made it overt, calling monogamy unnatural (Journal of Discourses, Vol. 11, p. 269). The LDS Church banned it in 1890 for Utah statehood, but the doctrine persists in D&C 132 and fundamentalist sects.

The Bible never endorses polygamy—Genesis 2:24 sets one man, one woman as God’s design. Polygamy’s fallout—jealousy, strife—shows in Abraham and David’s stories. Smith’s “revelation” smells more like personal justification than divine will, especially given his 1826 fraud conviction and penchant for tall tales.

The Angel Moroni: Messenger or Masquerade?

Moroni, a resurrected Nephite, allegedly appeared to Smith in 1823, guiding him to the plates. Smith described a glowing figure (Joseph Smith—History 1:30-33), but no one else saw Moroni or the plates directly—only via “spiritual eyes” for three witnesses, whose credibility wavers (e.g., Martin Harris’ Shaker flip). Galatians 1:8 warns: “If we or an angel from heaven preach any other gospel… let him be accursed.” Moroni’s “new gospel” fits this bill—adding to Scripture (Revelation 22:18-19) with a tale the Bible never hints at.

Smith’s history as a treasure-digger, convicted for “glass-looking” (using seer stones), casts doubt. Was Moroni a divine envoy or a con man’s prop? The Bible’s angels point to Christ alone—not new books or planets.

Biblical Warnings: False Teachers Foretold

The Bible’s stark on false prophets: “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves” (Matthew 7:15). Smith’s failed prophecies—like the 1835 claim Jesus would return within 56 years (History of the Church, Vol. 2, p. 189)—flunk Deuteronomy 18:22’s test. His character—polygamy, arson (Nauvoo Expositor), violence—hardly mirrors biblical holiness (Colossians 1:10). Second Peter 2:1 nails it: “False prophets… bring in destructive heresies.”

Mormonism’s “other gospel”—Jesus as Satan’s brother, God on Kolob, works-based godhood—strays far from Paul’s grace-alone faith (Ephesians 2:8-9). The Book of Mormon’s lack of evidence and plagiarism amplify the warning: this isn’t restoration; it’s reinvention.

Why It Matters

Mormonism’s 16 million followers (2023 estimate) deserve scrutiny, not blind trust. Its absurdities—plagiarized scriptures, cosmic family dramas, racist roots, polygamist past—don’t hold up. As we reflect, the contrast is clear: the Bible’s God is eternal, not a Kolob landlord; Jesus is Savior, not Satan’s sibling. Smith’s angel and gospel echo the Bible’s cautions, not its truths.

So, is Mormonism divine or delusional? The evidence leans hard to the latter—a 19th-century fantasy spun by a charismatic fraud. The Catholic Church, tracing to Peter (Matthew 16:18), holds historical heft Smith’s sect lacks. Dig past the PR: Mormonism’s a house of cards, and the Bible’s wind still blows it down.

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This post is extensive, blending critique with historical and biblical analysis. It avoids direct X citations but reflects sentiments found there, focusing on verifiable claims from LDS texts, scholarship, and Scripture.