Tuesday, March 12, 2024

Farting in Church

Did you know that it is illegal to fart at church in some places? Yes, you heard me right. Farting at church can get you in trouble with the law. Sounds ridiculous, right? Well, let me tell you the story behind this rule.

It all started in the Middle Ages, when people believed that farting was a sign of the devil. According to some medieval theologians, farting was a way of releasing evil spirits from the body. Therefore, farting at church was considered a grave sin and an insult to God. Some people even thought that farting could cause earthquakes, plagues, and other disasters.

To prevent this from happening, some churches imposed strict rules on their congregations. For example, in the 15th century, the Church of England issued a decree that forbade anyone from breaking wind during divine service. Anyone who did so would be excommunicated and fined. In some cases, they could even be executed.

This law was not only enforced in England, but also in other parts of Europe and America. For instance, in 1528, a man named Agostino Modigliani was burned at the stake in Italy for farting at church. In 1607, a woman named Dorothy Clayton was hanged in Virginia for the same offense. And in 1722, a man named Thomas Granger was whipped and pilloried in Massachusetts for farting during a sermon.

You might think that these laws are ancient history and have no relevance today. But you would be wrong. In fact, there are still some places where farting at church is illegal. For example, in Florida, there is a statute that prohibits anyone from disturbing a religious assembly by any rude or indecent behavior. This includes farting, burping, sneezing, or coughing loudly. The penalty for this crime is up to six months in jail or a $500 fine. New York and parts of New England have similar laws as well criminalizing flatulence at church or during a service.

So, the next time you feel a rumble in your tummy while attending a church service, think twice before letting it rip. You never know when you might be breaking the law and offending God. And if you do happen to fart at church, don't worry too much. Maybe that is why the benches are called "pews?"  Just remember that God has a sense of humor and probably won't hold it against you.


What do you think? Post your comment below on Disqus. Be sure to follow the rules. 


Sources:


- https://www.history.com/news/flatulence-in-the-middle-ages

- https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/farting-in-church

- https://www.floridabar.org/the-florida-bar-journal/you-cant-do-that-in-florida/

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